my secret worry
while fear of death is universal, my worry about death is so overwhelming that there is not a moment passing without my thinking of it. i never bring this up with any other, just because no one will ever realize the seriousness of this problem. i know it very clearly that as long as there is life, there will be death. in addition, though i am still so far away from death, i have been plagued by the thought of it for years. fortunately, the root of my fear of death lies in my overzealous love for life. i am too timid to think of the end of life, when every worldly affair should be thrown away. how can i carry on without friendship, affection, and joy of being alive? i really hate to leave all these behind. to ease my worry about death, i should make the fullest use of this life i now possess. concentration on this life can at least temporally make me forget about death. as a matter of fact, i really don＇t need to worry so much about death, for i already have too much to worry about this life.
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